Thanksgiving Thanks

It's no secret that my family has been going through tough times. But we are not different than any family. Everyone experiences ups and downs.

Something that I am finding out is that these tough times are changing my ways, my thinking, my attitudes. Changing them forever.

I have become so much more thankful than I used to be. Things that I used to take for granted have become daily blessings. It is surprising actually that I had so much and never noticed. Now that so much is gone, I'm more grateful for the little things.

So to say my thanks and spread the spirit of Thanksgiving, I would like to share my new found blessings I give thanks for.

1. I am thankful that my alarm goes off at 5 a.m. in the morning so that I can head out for a dawn run. I see the sunrise and smell early morning a few times a week, and that's something many people miss.

2. I am thankful that I can only run three or four miles during the week because I have to rush back to get ready for work. My job used to be something that tied me down, but now it is everything that allows me to provide for my family.

3. I am thankful for my community. There are people who I barely know who have come forward, in amazing ways, to offer help, assistance and support. It humbles me, and it makes me want to be a better person.

4. I am thankful for the little voices and pitter-patter of feet that wake me up on the few days I have the luxury of sleeping in. They are my children, my reason behind any action, my heart.

5. I am thankful for my health. I can run, jump, play and swim with my family.

6. I am thankful for the roof over my head. With its old electrical system and its leaky roof, it keeps us warm at night and provides shelter, which unfortunately, some people do not have.

7. I am thankful for my family. While family can be such a source of headache and drama, my family has circled around us, supported us during our worse times.

8. I am thankful for my hubby. We don’t always get along, and we don’t always agree, but I am most thankful that in our toughest times we have one another to lean on. I have a person who will always be on my team through thick and thin.

Regardless of situation or circumstance, it is the start of the season of giving thanks and spreading joy. Joy, like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder, and I am so grateful that my vision is clear.

Happy Thanksgiving from my family to yours!

Huate Mom Goes Marathoner

Sometimes, with a family to manage, things seem impossible. There is no time, no help and too much to do. This past weekend I learned that nothing is impossible.

Last April I set a goal that seemed to be unreachable. At the Hollywood Half Marathon Expo, I walked past the Long Beach IBC Marathon booth and signed up for the full marathon. Although I was a seasoned half marathon runner, I had never given serious thought to running the full 26.2 miles. Who knows what was in the air that day, the smell of new running shoes maybe, but I did it. I signed up.
From that day the training began. Little by little, I plugged away building towards my marathon. I planned, I ran, I sacrificed. And so did my family.

While running is obviously a big part of my lifestyle, taking on the task of completing 15-, 20- and 23-mile training runs is a whole other ball game. Goodbye quick morning jogs; hello long three to four hour runs.

I often stopped along the way to reconsider. Training for the marathon was cutting into my already busy schedule and taking away from my family.

But, for anyone who knows me,  I don’t back down. I do what I commit to, and I had already committed to my first full marathon. In my mind, I had to do this for myself and there was no going back.

On Sunday, October 13, I awoke at 3:30 am. The cool fall weather I had been hoping for promised to hold out long enough to get through my big day. I said goodbye to my children the night before and, leaving them behind with my mom, the hubby and I drove downtown in the dark.

Standing in the corral at the marathon start, I knew I had done the right thing. All of the time, the training and the sacrifice had been worth it. I was about to check an item off my bucket list.
There were a number of times on course where my children came to mind. My heart and my soul stayed focused on the things that give me strength.

As a mom, there are so many opportunities that we shrug off because of our families, busy schedules and time constraints. Yet I learned that sometimes, seizing an opportunity can be a positive experience for the whole family. It gives us pride as well as reminders of strength and ability. I am so fulfilled by my marathon completion.

I watch Stella walk around with my medal around her neck and know that all the hard work has given my children a positive lesson in never giving up. It will remind them to go for the goals that they may think are impossible. And, this experience reminds me of how wonderful it is to be a haute mom.

It's All About Being a Mom

Being a mom is hard. I learned that long time ago, when I had my first child.  And just when I thought I had figured it all out, I got pregnant. And now I have two little ones. Stella is just shy of three years old and our new addition, Carter is seven months.

My reward for sucking it up.

To make things a little more complicated, I just went back to work. Back to work as in my full time job and my part-time evening job. I love both jobs so it wasn’t difficult to go back except for the fact that now all the other things that have to get done have to wait until after 5 pm.

Some people say since the hubby is home (he lost his job at the beginning of 2013,) he can do those things that need to get done around the house.  For those of you who have hubbies, you can laugh with me. Ha.

Every now and then, I feel like a superhero. And it’s a good feeling.  Yesterday, I got to work at 7 a.m. I ran home at lunch to nurse Carter. I had to be at my second job by 4:00 and got back home around 6:00. I threw dinner on the stove, put the running shoes on and hit the pavement for a four mile run. I got back in time to have dinner with my family. Granted I was sweaty but beggars can’t be choosers.

There was a day when I might have thrown myself a pity party.  I would have been bummed because I had too many things to do to go out for a run.  Or I would have felt guilty for choosing to run (which keeps me sane) and then ordering take out, or not having dinner with my kids.

But this time I grabbed the bull by the horns and took charge. It felt good.  I have learned that sometimes, you just have to suck it up. Because maybe, every now and then, you can be a good mom. And that is what it's all about.

You're a mom but do you "own" it?

A recent video of parents “rapping” about their household has been circling Facebook. The message is simple: Kids radically change your life and you should own it.

I’m sure I have talked plenty about all the changes kids bring, but the “owning” it part is new. With a two-and-a-half-year-old and a six-week-old, I am finally getting ahold of this concept.

I don’t stay out late anymore. I always have wet wipes in my purse. I have replaced designer duds for those that wash easily. Unfortunately, I spent a good part of my first child’s infancy struggling to maintain part of my old life. And I missed out on enjoying my new one.

There is so much that goes into parenting that it is easy to wish for the simpler life you had before. When there was nothing to worry about but you and your significant other. The hubby and I still reminisce about those days, but we have realized that — although more complicated — our lives are so much fuller now.

Crumbs, endless laundry, and pajama time at 9 p.m. works perfectly for me. Getting dressed up means I have to put make-up on. Nights out are still fun, and as I said last week, much needed. But things have changed from frequent nights on the town to family time at home. My recent adult-only nights out have shown me one thing, the only thing I am missing out on are my kids.

I am a mom of two. And like I used to with my designer jeans, I am going to own it — in style.

Check out the video that inspired this post. Hilarious.

There Is No "I" In Team

I am learning that parenting is like a roller coaster.

One day your child is an angel and the next, you catch a glimpse of a devil’s tail as they round the corner. As Stella gets older, I am learning that the change is more frequent and unpredictable.

One of our current challenges is getting Stella to bed. We somehow seem to be missing the “window” of optimum sleepy time and find ourselves in the hyper, second-wind stage.

With me working three 12-hour days (and being five months pregnant), my hubby and I have settled into our bedtime routine roles. I am in charge of bubbles and bath time and then I pass Stella on to her father for stories and bedtime. Sometimes, as I am drifting in and out of sleep, I can hear my husband’s attempts to calm Stella down way past 9:30 p.m.

As you can imagine, the role sharing is not always “fair” (it never is, is it.) I get to be in bed before the hubby while he sometimes struggles late into the night (late for me, that is) to get Stella down. He gets frustrated. A lot.

When the frustration arises, I have to, very gently, remind him that if we want to look at “fairness," there are plenty of other roles that I would happily trade for bedtime.

Although this is not always well received, in the end, we have to remember that our household can only be successful if both of us are involved.

Unfortunately, working full time can get in the way for both of us. Even after a long day at the office, the household still needs to be tended to, by both of us.

The other night — on one of our rare nights where we were both awake at the same time — my husband wondered aloud what we were going to do when baby number two comes. I told him we would do the same thing that we were doing now, happily (sometimes) sharing the duties of running a house with not one, but two children.

All couples argue and fight. Life is stressful with or without children. The one thing that I try to remember is that as parents, the only way to successfully run the household is to work together, in whatever way that may work.

When keeping score, it may not always appear as an even game, but in the end, it somehow works. Single parents deserve a standing ovation … and big bottle of wine.