Thursday, November 4, 2010

Haute Mom Dilemma #18 - Working Mom

I happened to glance at the date today and realized that we are already into November. My heart sank. I am scheduled to go back to work on December 7th, almost one month from today.

I have worked two jobs for the last five years. I teach 7th grade (this is my 11th year) and I teach at a state university in the evenings. I have always been lucky enough to take a leave of absence or some time off with my jobs without having to worry about losing them. I took advantage of this when I had Stella. I have been off since April 2010, almost seven months. I had always been told by many who know me that I was going to be one of those moms that can't wait to get back to work after having my child. I am not. Not even close. I enjoy being home with my daughter and teaching part-time in the evenings has been perfect for my husband and I, except financially. After much discussion, we have decided that in order to achieve our goals for the future (paying off our debt, being financially secure, buying a bigger house, having more children) I need to return to work in December.

I will be leaving Stella in the good hands of our nanny three days a week, and my husband will stay home twice a week and then head to work when I get home from my day. This pulls at my heart strings, but I have to remind myself that many moms have to go out and face the work force with their little ones in the care of others. Many of those moms returned to work far sooner than I have had to.

One of the reasons why I waited to have children was that I was unsure how being a teacher would affect being a parent. As a teacher, you spend hours giving attention to your students, practicing your patience, and often times, doing some parenting. I want to have energy and patience when I get home, and I am still concerned with finding the balance between the two. For this reason, I have decided to interview for a position in my district that would take me out of the classroom and put me into an office-type environment. I would still be involved in education but not directly with students. I will be looking at slightly longer hours, but I also will have a little more flexibility should I need to be there for Stella. I have many mixed emotions, but at this point, I think this is the best move for me and my family. I interview on Monday.

Either way, I will be returning to work on December 7th. It may very well, involve some tears. I will be leaving the group of SAHMs and joining moms in the work force. I do find it important to have my own career - this is one of my haute qualities. I don't want to have to start over in three years when Stella goes to school. I hope that I am not doing it at the expense of my child, but I know there are worse things than being a working mom. For all of you who have been working, whether it be from home or out in the world, I have the utmost respect for you. It is tough. For all of you stay at home moms, realize how lucky you are to be in a situation where you can be with your children. Whichever one you are, stay haute and wish me luck!

13 comments:

  1. Wishing you lots of luck!! I went back to work after both my babies were born. Had about 4 months off with each of them. I found the anxiety of going back is often worse than actually doing it... try not to focus on the date that is coming, focus on the the day at hand. Enjoys all the moments! The next chapter to come will just be another one of life's transitions. You can do it! :-)

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  2. It is very hard to go back to work ... and even harder to get into the 'mindset' of work-brain once you are there... I was off for 14 weeks, not nearly close to how long you've had off, and it was hard. The good thing is (and it's the saving grace I think) - You look forward to coming home and spending time with your family - it becomes cherished time. In the meantime, enjoy your time off with little Stella!! :)

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  3. Good luck with the job interview. You will make the adjustment. It might be hard at first, but you will find the balance.

    -a working mama!

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  4. hey! it was super hard to return to work, no lie. like you, i had almost 7 months off with elsie + the 1 month i took off prior to her birth. to my surprise, i really enjoy being at work. my desk is surrounded by elsie pictures, but i really do love my job. and i incorporate elsie into as many lessons as possible ;) of course i miss elsie terribly, and there are days when i sneak out early to get home to her, but i approach my job differently than before i was mommy. while i still really care about my students, my life is my family, not my job. i will be there for my students, but my daughter needs me more. i hope that when elsie grows up, she will see that i went to work and did something good for others less fortunate than her. you have wonderful care lined up for stella. and this time that the hubby will be with her is priceless! coming home each day will be like christmas morning :) you'll get to wear your haute clothes and accessories again - that's what helps me in the mornings get out of bed from snuggling with my sweet angel ;)

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  5. Good luck!
    I'm a new follower. Please stop by my blog when you can.
    www.thehappyclipper.com

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  6. Hi I´m also a new follower.It will be hard but it can be done... besides there´s always a bright side, you will miss you little one and make the most of the time you have. Disconecting can make you be a better mom. (at least it´s what I feel) I was on maternity leave for 5 months so you can imagine its hard to leave a baby that barely sits...good luck with your interview.
    please stop by my blog when you can
    http://2ourbaby.blogspot.com

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  7. I work towards making money from home....haven't quite got that figured out though!
    Best of luck to you in whatever you decide.

    I'm in to follow you with U Follow Me I Follow U Friday.
    Have a great day!

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  8. Good luck returning to work. It will be ok! I am now following you now! And I found you on Friday Friendly Follow!

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  9. I am your newest follower!
    Please follow back, I would greatly appreciate it!
    Quick Tattletails
    :)

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  10. Hello I'm following with GFC from a few other blog hops..

    Cindy @ http://thepurplefroggieclaystuff.blogspot.com/

    I always follow back!

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  11. Best of luck with your interview.

    Following your blog from Bloggy Moms

    www.touchofhomelearning.blogspot.com
    www.thehickmanfour.blogspot.com

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  12. Hi, i am really sorry that you have to go back to work.. It must be really tough. My hubby and I decided that I stay home when my daughter was born, It's tough too and we had to cut back on EVERYTHING. I guess, it can be difficult either way. I hope things work out for you!

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  13. I know it will be difficult to leave her, but I also know that you will adjust and balance mommy and educator.

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