I was sitting in my living room today in silence, Stella asleep on my chest, soaking in the sound of nothingness when I heard, "Hey Mama Tenny" at my back door. My guard dog, Sierra, went into attack mode, barking and growling loudly as Stella woke up crying. I got up grumbling, wondering what idiot would shout into my house knowing that I had a baby and saw my friend and his 15 month old son. Well, it was actually my ex-husband which would explain the idiot part; we can discuss the 'ex" part at another time. Luckily my ex-hub and I are really good friends and I come to find out that he was just checking on me and my new role as mom. I actually think he was coming over to see how I was handling the whole thing so he could have a good chuckle on the way home. Thank goodness I showered and put some make-up on today, eh ladies? I walk outside and as we chat, I introduce Stella to his son, Kai. As he asks me 20 questions about motherhood and how hard it's been, Kai shows off his new walking skills in my driveway. I ask how things are now that his son is walking, wondering if it is easier now that his baby is mobile. His reply is simply, "No" and he goes on to philosophize that he doesn't forsee things getting any easier until Kai can make his own breakfast.
This gets me thinking...does it ever get easier? I have fully accepted my new role and am beginning to love it more and more and cry less and less. I often think that as Stella accomplishes each new milestone, my role will get a little easier. For example, I couldn't wait until she was able to hold her head up, thinking that this would free up one hand to do things with while I held her. Then I was thinking that it would be easier when she could roll over so she could stop screaming during play/tummytime and just roll herself over instead of needing me to do it. Now I am thinking that it will get easier when she can sit all by herself...I guess the moral of this story is that it never gets easier! I haven't even thought further ahead than one year old but thinking about 16 years old, 18 years old...we are getting into a whole other world of easier or rather...not so much! Can any of you out there tell me when it gets easier?
Stella reaching milestone...rolling over. Well, I guess she just rolled over in this one. :)