Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Nourishing the Roots

I write a lot about taking care of my children. I have recently realized that I overlook something that I think most parents overlook: Taking care of the parents.

It is a known fact that 50% of marriages end in divorce. In fact, I would bet that that number is higher now. Between putting food on the table and focusing on the kids, I think many couples forget that they have relationships to nurture.

It’s so hard to make time for anything else but work and your kids.
Date night to a Dave Matthews Band concert
When I do find time, my dear hubby often encourages me to go out and do something on my own. He pushes me to get a pedicure, or take a girls’ night out, or something to that effect. Although this is important too, I have learned that it is more important to spend time alone with him.

Getting someone to care for both our kids (especially since our new addition, Carter, is only five weeks old) is outside of my comfort zone. I relax more when the kids are with my hubby. However, stepping outside this comfort zone is important if I want to make sure we get our couple time together. And so it is done.

While many of my married girlfriends are doing everything they can to get a night out with the girls, I plan on nights out with my man as my date. We go dancing, hit some concerts, or have quick, quiet adult dinners. I have noticed that our other friends, who do similar, seem to have more solid, satisfying marriages.

I will admit that not too long ago, I was one of those women who wanted out of the house without the hubby. Although there is certainly nothing wrong with this, I found that our relationship was getting the short end of the stick.

Like with any team, bonding is important. It is hard to do with kids in the mix. And it certainly doesn’t happen after a long night of dinner, baths, and bedtime with two youngsters. Make it a priority to spend alone time with your significant other, even if it is just an hour or two.

Your entire family will benefit.


  1. I could not agree with you more! We have three kiddos which makes it difficult and expensive to get a date night- but we do it as often as we can. Next up we would really love to do a weekend away without the boys, but we might have to take a loan out for that ;)

  2. I completely agree. My husband and I try to get out on our own for a date night as often as we can - we don't have any family members that help us so we rely on our babysitter which is hard b/c if she is not free then we are out of luck. But we do try to get out often. I have friends that have not gone out on their own once and their baby is 1 yr old - and she wonders why she is having such a hard time. I think it is a MUST. :)


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